For Granted.

In a simple way, she loved him. Not a strong or overpowering love, but the love of a friend. It was not without merit or need, she knew she couldn’t live without him, yet she also knew she didn’t want him. It was as, always, what it was.

She used him as her confidant, her go to, and her cuddle buddy. When she was in need of a pick me up, she knew his words would give her the courage, self-esteem and a much needed giggle. She was grateful for his friendship, for the caring he showed her. It was in so many ways perfect.

The day wore a funny face for her today. From the time she woke up and had her morning tea. It was just a bit hazy or a bit blurred. It nagged at her through her day. She texted him without replies, which although not unheard of, was rare. Coming back from the gym she checked her mail and found a letter from him.

“My Darling,

Once I would have moved mountains, swam raging rivers. I would have crossed a desert just for you. There was a time when a look from you would have made everything okay. Moments that were frozen in my mind…the time you cried for me…the time you came to me…the time you made me feel special and needed.

We have grown up together and grown used to each other. I would say that we couldn’t live without, but as you have said, can’t live with. I have told you that I love you, have whispered it while you sleep. I have touched your face and lost myself in your touch, only to know it isn’t true.

I write to you as a pauper,

Poor with only rags to wear,

I offer you my only bread,

Though hunger lays me bare.

I write to you as your poet,

With words you have heard,

I say once more I love you,

As if sung by a song bird.

I hope this letter finds you,

And a tear is quietly shed,

I know I can not have you,

As you have always said.

One last poem, one last smile.

Goodbye.”

She held it in her hands, and trembled at the words. Her perfect world crumbling around her. She texted again, ignoring the letter as she always ignored him when went on about his feelings. She just needed to talk to him and he would come back, he always came back.

She waited, staring at the phone. In the distance she heard a siren, barely loud enough to hear.

She started to cry.

Could her love,

Really say goodbye?

 

 

 

 

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