Circle

Little circles

turning round my head

like wheels spinning

like a line reread

clicking and clacking

ticking and tocking

overwhelming

yet comforting

a race never-ending

a space never filling

circle, circle, circle

dizzying in its

repetition

like a roundabout

hold on tight

or let gravity

have its part

turn, turn, turn

painted smiles

spiral down my face

laughter

hidden in that disgrace

STOP

and no more circles

just straight lines

give me a push

I’ll take the spin

a line is just a line

but a circle leaves a grin.

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Time.

and i stared at the wall,

blank and bare,

like my mind,

my life,

no colour to distract,

no story to tell,

just empty,

and quiet,

i looked to the ground,

saw the buckets of paint,

i grinned,

whispering,

“let’s begin…”

ending…in the light of a broken blind…

and I heard her,

in the morning of the end,

the light through a broken blind,

the sun in my eyes,

the sting of the day,

her hip against mine,

a touch without thought,

it mattered.

her face,

turned to mine,

eyes closed,

soft noises of sleep,

without the harsh light in in her eyes,

perfect,

in ways I could never say,

my hand on her cheek,

but I couldn’t feel,

her warmth was gone,

our life,

suddenly not a perfect grin,

my breath,

silent to this new day,

my body still,

but my heart remains,

my voice strained,

to just say one more time,

I love you,

and i am so sorry,

I never wanted to leave,

to go,

my darling…my darling…

I died.